February 2, 2008


apostrophes for sale

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apples new washer

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Drew, the author of Toothpaste For Dinner and Married To The Sea, was born in October 1979. He lives with his wife and two small dogs in Upper Arlington, a neighborhood in Columbus, Ohio.

His full-time occupation is “humorist.”


* “The Illustrated Drew”, online and partial print, 1997-9.
* “Drew”, online, 2000-2.
* “The Drew Book”, 1000-run 32pp book, 2001.
* “Drew (column in .net magazine)”, print, 2001-5.
* “Toothpaste For Dinner”, online, 2002-present.
* “Mad Drew: Beyond Coffeedome”, 35k-run 128pp trade paperback, 2003.
* “Toothpaste For Dinner: Hipsters, Hamsters, and other Pressing Issues”, 30k-run 200pp trade paperback, 2005.
* “Married To The Sea”, online, 2006-present.
* “Where Are The Dogs Humping”, online, 2007-present.


* Contest 2006

* Contest 2007

* Random Livejournal picture generator (refresh to get more pictures.)

* Morrissey Dance (2004)


Drew does not accept unsolicited ideas for comics or merchandise. Any content (text, images, or otherwise) that you send to the email address below may be displayed on Toothpaste For Dinner, in any form, in perpetuity, worldwide.

If you have a question about something you ordered, try the store information page.




Toothpaste For Dinner serves an average of 1 million front-page impressions per day. The omission of traditional advertising is intentional. If you are interested in sponsoring Toothpaste For Dinner, e-mail Drew. Toothpaste For Dinner is one of the most popular comics online, and has maintained a strict daily schedule since August 2003.

STATISTICS. Updated January 1, 2008.

Toothpaste For Dinner statistics:
* 38.2 million comics served per month.
* TFD has updated daily at midnight eastern time since August 28, 2003.
* There are 2,212 Toothpaste For Dinner comics on (Jan 1, 2008.)

Married To The Sea statistics:
* 28.1 million comics served per month.
* MTTS has updated daily at midnight eastern time since March 6, 2006.
* There are 691 Married To The Sea comics on (Jan 1, 2008.)


Toothpaste For Dinner cartoons and articles, and Married To The Sea cartoons (hereafter collectively referred to as “TFD/MTTS”) are available to license for publication (as a book collection of new or existing content) within the United States.

Send an email with the subject “Publication Request” and as many details as possible to:


TFD/MTTS comics are syndicated weekly in 26 alt-weekly and college papers. If you want to see TFD/MTTS in your favorite magazine or your local paper, send a POLITE note to the editor, with a link to the site, and a request to syndicate our comics. Papers/magazines that run TFD/MTTS have their choice of comics to run, in any order, and can choose from over 2800 different comics.

If you work for a PRINT publication and want to run TFD/MTTS daily or weekly, send an email with the subject “Syndication Request” to: Please include the name, location, and approx. circulation of your publication when you write.


For online syndication rates, send an email with the subject “Online Syndication” to: Please include the name, url, and traffic figures for your website when you write.

We do not offer online syndication for free. You may not run a daily syndication or “feed” of TFD/MTTS on your website, RSS or otherwise, without explicit written permission.


You may display TFD/MTTS comics on your website, blog, Myspace, Livejournal, etc. as long as you link back to / The box marked “Cut/paste this HTML code” next to every comic does this for you.

You may not publish TFD/MTTS in print, on television, or other media, without prior permission, unless it is part of an accompanying article about TFD/MTTS.

You may not operate a daily “feed” of TFD/MTTS.

You may not imprint TFD/MTTS on merchandise without prior permission. You may not use all or part of a TFD/MTTS comic as a design element on your own website without prior permission.


If you ever see someone besides me selling TFD/MTTS merchandise of any kind, email Drew. There’s a reward in it for you. There are no current licensees for Toothpaste For Dinner, Married To The Sea, or Natalie Dee merchandise.


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